Mastering the Groom's Speech: Crafting a Memorable and Heartfelt Toast

So, you're ready to write your groom's speech. But where do you start!? Finding the right words can be a little daunting. That's why we've put together our best tips to help you get started. Goodbye, writer's block! Here's how you can write a speech to have your guests laughing, cheering and crying (the good kind)...

Our top tip? Be yourself, celebrate your love, and have fun! Even if nerves kick in, remember that your audience will be the most supportive and caring group of individuals you could ever hope for. You've got this!

Let's start at the very beginning. The history of the groom’s speech is steeped in tradition. During medieval and renaissance periods, the groom’s speech was an essential part of the wedding feast, used to publicly thank the bride's family for their daughter's hand in marriage. This practice helped establish ties between families and communities.

Fast forward a couple thousand years and the groom’s speech looks and sounds a little different. Today, the groom’s speech has evolved from a formal expression of gratitude and alliance to a more heartfelt and emotional moment (tissues are a must) reflecting the changing attitudes towards love, marriage, and individuality in different cultures and periods. It's not uncommon to see both partners give speeches either - sometimes even combining them in a joint speech. Today, the groom's speech is filled with genuine emotions, adding a personal and sentimental touch to the celebration.

The key to preparing any speech is to start early, i.e. no later than a month before your wedding day. Doing this will give you plenty of time to practice so you feel confident when the big day arrives. 

Remember that practice makes perfect! You could try rehearsing in front of a mirror or with a friend you trust. If you're feeling brave, recording yourself can be a great way to see your body language. But most importantly, don't take your wedding speech too seriously. Have fun writing it! You'll be speaking to your nearest and dearest - they're all there for you! Be yourself, and you can't go wrong.

1. Keep It Short and Sweet
   Time is of the essence! While your speech should be heartfelt and meaningful, it's essential to keep it concise. Aim for around five minutes to keep your guests engaged and prevent restless glances at the clock.
2. Mix Humour With Heartfelt Emotion
   Infuse your speech with a healthy dose of humour and sincerity. Share anecdotes about your journey as a couple, but balance them with sentiments that showcase your love and appreciation.
3. Tell Your Love Story
   Share the funny stories, the romantic moments, and the little things that made you fall in love. This is your chance to celebrate your relationshpi with those who love you most. So don't be afraid to get personal!
4. Toast to the Future
   Raise your glass high and toast to the exciting adventures ahead! Express your commitment to your partner and share your hopes and dreams for your future together.

1. Introduction
   Take a moment to recognise the contributions of the wedding party, parents, and all those who have made your special day possible. Share your appreciation for friends and family who have travelled near and far to be part of your celebration. Personalised shout-outs go a long way in making guests feel cherished.
2. Compliment Your Partner
   Take a moment to express your love and admiration for your partner. Share a heartfelt and genuine compliment about your partner's qualities or the effort they put into making the day special.
3. Share A Memory
   Choose a memorable and light-hearted story from your relationship or wedding planning journey to share with the guests. Keep it short and sweet, and make sure it hasn't already been mentioned in other toasts.
4. Acknowledging the Reception
   ⁠Make a comment about the atmosphere, the food, the band, or any special moments happening during the reception. Connect with your guests and make them feel included in the celebration.
5. Thank Everyone Again for Their Presence and Support
   Mention specific individuals or groups that you may have forgotten to thank earlier, such as the officiant, staff, or specific family members. Raise a glass to toast your partner, family, and friends.

Using the above structure, here is an example of a groom's speech. Remember, this is just a template to guide you. Feel free to personalise it and add your own anecdotes and emotions. The goal is to speak from the heart and create a memorable speech that celebrates the love and joy of your special day.

Groom:

"Good evening, everyone! Thank you all for being here. It means the world to us.

I would like to start by thanking my best man and groomsmen for all their support and entertainment leading up to today. You guys have been there for me through thick and thin, and I don't know what I would have done without you. And to Mum and Dad, thank you for everything. Especially for helping me choose my tie. I quite literally don't think I could have done it without you.

I would now like to talk a little bit about Ellie. She is the most amazing woman I know. Ellie, your infectious laughter and kindness never fail to fill any room with joy. You make everyone feel welcome and loved, and I am so lucky to have you in my life.

If you know Ellie, you'll know she's a sucker for romance. I'm not entirely sure how I won her over, but I'm glad I did. We first met in a greasy kebab shop at 2 am. I tried to woo her with one of my favourite Flight of the Conchords quotes. I looked into her eyes and said, "I can't believe I'm sharing a kebab with the most beautiful girl I have ever seen...with a kebab." Luckily, Ellie has a great sense of humour.

For Ellie's 30th, she asked for a surprise meal. I had to choose the place. So, obviously, I pre-ordered a kebab, picked Ellie up and surprised her with the greasiest treat, for old time's sake. (I must say, it doesn't taste as good when you're sober). We headed for the park, where I had done my best to lay out a 'pretty' picnic, kitted out with wine, a gigantic bag of monster munch and her favourite chocolates. Thirty minutes later, the heavens opened. We were drenched head to toe.

I'd like you all to remember that good old saying, "It's the thought that counts." Ellie, I'm sure there are many times when you've been thinking, "What was he thinking!?". But I can promise you one thing - I will never stop thinking about ways to make you happy. I know I'm a little goofy, and sometimes I get it terribly wrong, but we always have the best times together. Even when we're both drenched, holding a soggy grease-ridden kebab.

Now, everyone, you'll be glad to know the food options tonight are a little more appetising. And I'm sure you're all eager for me to get on with it so you can try them.

But I wanted to quickly take another moment to thank all our incredible vendors and all the individuals who have helped organise this day. Who knew weddings require so much planning!? I will remember this day forever, but I'll also be very glad to never think about a seating plan again. And yes, Harry, we put you on the table with the kids on purpose.

I'd love you all to join me in toasting Ellie. I love you. Thank you for doing life with me. And to all our family and friends, thanks again for being here. I'm looking forward to seeing many of you on the dancefloor later!

Cheers!"

There are two schools of thought on when to give a groom's speech. Some people believe that it is better to give a speech before the wedding breakfast, so that you can relax and enjoy the meal afterwards. If you're sticking to tradition, the groom usually gives their speech after the meal has been served. It's really up to personal preference and what works best for you and your guests!

Here is the traditional order of speeches at a wedding reception:

1. Father of the Bride
   The father of the bride usually gives the first speech, welcoming the guests and expressing his joy and blessings for the newlyweds.
2. Best Man
   The best man's speech usually follows the father of the bride's speech. He often shares stories and anecdotes about the groom and offers humorous and heartfelt words about the couple.
3. Groom
   After the best man's speech, it's the groom's turn. The groom's speech is a chance for him to thank the guests for attending, express his love and appreciation for his bride, and often, he also acknowledges both sets of parents for their support.
4. Partner
   In some weddings, the bride or partner might also choose to say a few words.

It's normal to feel nervous before giving a speech but don't let your nerves get the best of you. Take a few deep breaths before you start speaking, and focus on your audience. Remember, they are there to support you and to celebrate your marriage.

1. Smile and Breathe
   Taking a deep breath and putting on a smile might seem simple, but they are surprisingly effective in reducing stress and anxiety! When you take a deep breath, it signals your body that everything is okay, leading to a slower heart rate and relaxed muscles. Smiling, on the other hand, has multiple benefits. It triggers the release of endorphins, which naturally boost your mood.
2. Visualise Yourself Giving a Successful Speech
   Imagine yourself delivering your speech smoothly and confidently. This will help to boost your confidence and to reduce your anxiety.
3. Avoid Alcohol
   Alcohol may seem like a good way to calm your nerves, but it can actually make your anxiety worse. Instead, drink plenty of water and eat healthy foods to keep your energy levels up.
4. Get a Good Night’s Sleep
   Being well-rested will help you to feel more alert and confident on the day of the wedding.
5. Take Breaks
   If you start to feel overwhelmed, take a few minutes to step away and collect yourself. This will help you to relax and to regain your focus.

Remember, the groom's speech is your opportunity to celebrate your love and should be as unique as your relationship. If you're yourself, you won't go wrong! Even if nerves kick in, remember that your audience comprises the most supportive and caring group of individuals you could ever hope for—they're there to cheer you on every step of the way. Don't fret if you stumble! Laugh it off! Have fun with it. You've got this!